A vital question that is an escalating issue in a lot of marriages today is. 'Does the romance have to stop after having children?' Sadly to say, some marriages have ended because of a wedge growing between a couple once they have children. We are all guilty of saying we never have enough time for romance, but can you really use children as an excuse? Having children is such a precious gift, a gift some people take for granted. Children become even more precious when two people love each other so much they 'want' to share their time, love and space with their children. On the other hand, some parents become overwhelmed raising children--feeling burdened spending time with them, helping with school work, preparing meals and all the responsibilities in daily life. The couple becomes stressed, blames the stress and lack of romance on the children and the distance between the couple keeps growing. It doesn't have to be this way! With every problem, there is a solution. Finding it is the key. Here are three tips to help alleviate stress, promote a better relationship with your mate, and keep the kids happy, feeling loved, and well-nurtured. 1. Try getting the kids on a routine schedule for bedtime. Do this with your spouse and read stories to your children or whatever is appropriate for their age. This will result in quality time with your spouse after the kids go to sleep. This also enhances the bond with your spouse by engaging with the children together. 2. Contact someone you trust to babysit your children so you and your spouse can go on regular dates. The quality time you give to each other will create a closer bond and commitment and light the fire for romance. 3. If finances are a bit tight, pop in a movie at home and just have a family night with your children and the love of your life beside you. Showing your children you love each other and truly enjoy time together and with them, creates a peaceful household. Don't make excuses for your relationship turning sour because of children. A marriage can thrive with romance, whether you have children or not. It is really a choice you make. You can't wait for the perfect moment for romance. You have to make the moments you have count and do something with them. Romance should never stop in a marriage after having children. Romance should be in your daily life whether it's playing with your children and appreciating the little lives you've made together, or holding hands under a moonlit sky. It is much better to find ways to bring romance back into your marriage and save your marriage than to start over after divorce. |
Starting Over After 40
Starting Over After 40
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